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More on Forgiveness
I. LIFE NEED / INTRODUCTION
A. I preached on forgiveness a couple weeks ago, but I wasn't able to cover all I wanted. This morning I'll
review a bit of what I covered. Then we'll go from there. In preparation for communion, let's focus on the
complete forgiveness God offers us through Jesus.
B. God has always yearned for a relationship with his creation.
1. The problem has been sin. It started back in the
Garden of Eden, and continues to this day. God hates our sin. He hates our rebellious attitudes, our
inconsistency, our lukewarmness, our lack of commitment. He hates our wicked behavior. And
we're every one of us guilty.
2. And yet he's planning a kingdom in which we can
spend eternity with him. He's designed a means by which our sin can be forgiven, washed away,
actually eliminated. This is truly good news. But we mustn't take forgiveness lightly.
C. Understand The Forgiveness Concept.
1. Webster describes forgiveness as, "giving up
resentment or the desire to punish, to pardon, to cancel or remit the debt."
2. It's crucial that we know what forgiveness is not.
a.
Forgiveness is not discounting the violation, or ignoring it. It's not disregarding, tolerating,
excusing, overlooking, or closing ones eyes to the offense. It's not saying "It's okay," or, "It
doesn't matter." It's not simply letting time pass. It's not pretending the offense didn't occur. It's
not resigning ourselves to someone's actions, thinking, "Well, that's just the way he is." God's
done none of the above in forgiving our sin.
b. Far too often though, these are the working
definitions of forgiveness. They are inaccurate. They confuse the issue. They in fact short circuit
the process and often prevent complete forgiveness from taking place.
D. There Is Considerable Cost Involved In Forgiveness.
1. The forgiver pays the price, and does so willingly.
a. When it comes to God's forgiveness of our sins,
he paid dearly. God sacrificed his only begotten son, so that we might be forgiven. He gave his
own flesh and blood.
b. Jesus paid dearly as well. He laid down his life,
so that we might be forgiven. II Corinthians. 5:21 tells us he "became" sin so that we might be forgiven.
2. The forgiver pays the price. The price is
considerable. Earlier we read that Webster's Dictionary defines forgiveness as 'to cancel, or to
remit the debt." To "remit" is to pay.
E. God Does Thoroughly Forgive Our Sin.
1. We read all these verses before, so I'll just quote
from them today. God literally forgets our sin and guilt. He remembers it no more. He sweeps our sins
away, blots them out, pardons, forgives, covers our sin, does not count it against us, removes our
transgressions, puts them behind his back, shows mercy, treads our sins underfoot, and hurls them into
the sea.
2. It is this same God that we love and serve today. He
has not changed. What a comfort that is. What peace that means to a sinner who comes before God
through the Lord Jesus Christ.
3. Let us remember this as we partake of communion
this morning.
II. COMMUNION
A. Explanation
1. This bread and cup is for those of you who . . .
2. As the bread and cup are passed, confess your sins
and thank God for his forgiveness.
III. MORE REVIEW
A. We've also talked about the other side of the forgiveness coin. In the Lord's Prayer we ask God to "forgive us our
sins, as we forgive those who have sinned against us." God requires that we forgive others, if we are to be
forgiven by him. In fact, after teaching the Lord's Prayer, Jesus added, "but if you do not forgive men
their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." You see, it won't matter if we have believed the truth, if
we've been repentant, even if we've been baptized. If we refuse to forgive those who have sinned against us, we
will ourselves not be forgiven by God.
B. Jesus told a parable about a man . . . (Matt. 18:21-35.)
IV. MORE ON FORGIVENESS
A. Luke 17:1-10.
1. Confront (Matt. 18:15-17 -- privately; with
witnesses; tell the church.)
2. Forgive, forgive, forgive, forgive, forgive, forgive,
forgive!
3. It's your duty! You haven't done anything special!
B. Matt. 5:23,24. Notice the urgency of forgiveness.
C. Mark 11:25. Comments.
1. Grant forgiveness, otherwise it gets in the way of
your relationship with God.
2. Seek forgiveness from your brother, otherwise it gets
in the way of your relationship with God.
V. BIBLE APPLICATION
A. Forgiveness Is An Act Of the Will! (Taken from "Overcoming Hurt Through Forgiveness" by Ralph
Woerner)
1. "Someone confessed to me recently that he didn't
feel like forgiving the person who had injured him. No one ever does. If we wait until we feel like
forgiving an offender, we never will; not anymore than if we wait until we feel like cleaning out the
garage or changing a dirty diaper. Forgiveness isn't a feeling. It's something we choose to do by an act
of the will.
2. "Illustration: A middle-aged lady came to my office
one day. She was terribly distraught. When I asked in what way I might be able to help she answered, 'I
don't know where to begin.' 'Begin anyway you like,' I said. 'Just spill it out whatever is on your
mind.' Then she blurted out: 'I hate my son-in-law so much, I wish he were dead.' 'You really don't
hate him that much,' I tried to reassure her. 'But I do,' she insisted. Then, after summarizing some of
the evil things he had done she asked, 'What can I do to get rid of this awful hatred that I feel? Should I
attend church more regularly? Should I put more money in the offering plate? How do I get rid of
this terrible hate?' 'Attending church more regularly and putting more money in the offering
plate may be good things to do,' I replied, 'but that isn't going to solve your problem of hate.' 'What
am I going to do then?' She desperately wanted to know.
3. "I took her to Matthew 6 and read what Jesus said:
'If ye forgive men their trespasses your heavenly Father will also forgive yours, but if ye forgive
not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive yours.' 'I can't do that,' she insisted. 'I
can't forgive Bill for the things he's done.' 'You're using the wrong word,' I said. 'You can say I won't
forgive Bill because that's your choice. Forgiving Bill isn't a matter of an or can't, it's a matter of will
or won't. We choose to forgive or we choose not to forgive. Extending forgiveness or withholding
forgiveness is a matter of choice. You'll forgive Bill because you choose to forgive him, or you won't
forgive him because you choose not to do so. The decision to forgive or not to forgive is a decision
which you alone can make.
4. " 'If you want to be relieved of the depression which
you feel, you're going to have to extend forgiveness to Bill. If you're unwilling to do this, your hatred
will continue.' 'Forgive Bill just like that?' she asked. 'Just like that,' I replied. 'Just as Christ has
forgiven you the wrongs you have done you must forgive Bill the wrongs he has done. What's your
decision going to be?' After a long and deadly silence she said, 'I will.' 'Good,' I answered. 'Let's
tell the Lord this is what you're going to do.' She began by telling the Lord about the terrible things
which Bill had done. Then, finally she got around to saying: 'As you have forgiven me, today I also
forgive Bill.' After she had spoken those words, she relaxed, wiped the tears from her eyes, looked
up at me and said: 'Wow! Does that ever feel good.' In one blessed moment all the hatred which she felt
for Bill vanished away. A heavy load lifted from her heart. Her spirit was free. Healing doesn't come for
everyone as quickly, or as dramatically as it did for her. When we forgive, however, the healing process
can at least begin.
5. "When we forgive we're letting our offender off the
hook. We're releasing him from the obligation to repay what he owes from the need to return what he
has stolen from the need to apologize for what he has done from the need to make good on what he
has promised from the need to make a wrong right.
6. "When we forgive we choose to give up our grudge
despite the severity of the injury received. We're not pretending it didn't hurt or that it didn't matter.
We're simply forgiving what has been done.
7. "Forgiveness is an act of the will; it is a clear and
deliberate choice. This doesn't mean we feel any better about what happened. Nor does it mean the
damage wasn't real. Forgiveness means we've chosen to release our offender from what he owes.
Once we've done this the healing process is free to begin. Sometimes forgiveness brings instant release.
At other times it takes time for our emotions to catch up with the action which our will has taken. Thething which usually blocks healing from occurring is
we don't take the first step. We don't grant a judicial pardon to our offender. Once we do this the healing
process will begin automatically."
B. Tests Of Forgiveness (From Forgiving & Being Forgiven, by Neues Leben International) Five
Questions To Ask Yourself:
1. Are you able to acknowledge, and even thank God
for anything you may have learned during the pain?
2. Can you talk about your hurt without getting angry,
without feeling resentful, without the slightest thought of revenge?
3. Is there willingness truly to accept your part of the
blame for what happened?
4. Can you revisit the scene or the person(s) involved
in your hurt without experiencing a negative reaction?
5. Are you rewarding with good those who have hurt
you?
VI. LIFE RESPONSE
A. Sooner or later we all experience a certain amount of hurt in our lives. Since there's no way to totally
prevent this from happening, we must learn to cope the best we can. When offenses come, when pain has
been afflicted, it is critical to remember that what happens to you isn't nearly as important as what happens
in you!
B. How we're affected by the injuries we receive will be determined by the way we respond. We can relive the
event over and over in our minds until we're emotionally exhausted and clinically depressed or we can forgive the
offender and go on.
C. Injuries can make us bitter, or better, depending on how we respond. Not only we, but our family and friends will
be affected by the way we respond to any given hurt. To prevent anger, self-pity, and bitterness from taking root
in our lives, we must learn to, and practice forgiveness. Otherwise the wound will surely become infected. A
small wound which has become infected will almost certainly cause greater pain and consequences than a
larger wound which has been brought to healing.
D. Family counselor Earnie Larson says, "There is nothing that so deadens the soul, or that so retards spiritual
growth, freedom, and liberation than carrying around a heavy, stinking bag of resentment."
E. As someone else has said, "Unforgiveness dwells on the past. Forgiveness looks ahead!"
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